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13th November 2011

12:20am: Beauty Pageant
Popping in quickly from my extended business trip to share this little tidbit. My hotel is in a business district. It's a nice hotel, and there is an equally nice establishment in front of it with a large parking lot, no windows and some allegedly naked women inside. I say "allegedly" because I have not been inside to check clothing standards.

Each night, I'm coming back to the hotel pretty late, and each night, I giggle quietly to myself.

Because there's nothing that's not funny about the upcoming Miss Night Trips Pageant.

12th October 2011

7:55am: Greetings from the Horse World
Hello, friends. May I still call you friends? It has been so long since I've posted that you might have been forgiven for thinking me deceased and rolling in the grave. But glory, hallelujah, here I still am.

I spent the summer and the early part of the fall in travel for work-related purposes. I'm home for a little respite before starting up again, and I have two pieces of business.

1) Does anyone have a cure for stinky boy-cat poo? My boy kitty is as sweet as sugar candy, but his poo -- is not. I awaken in the middle of the night with a powerful, noxious stench in my nostrils, gagging me, then Mr. Lovey-Dovey jumps on the bed, turns his backside around near my face and THEN pats my mouth with his soft little paw to make sure I'm still breathing.

No, kitty, no, I'm not breathing. I'M UNABLE TO BREATHE FROM YOUR STINKY POO.

Any suggestions? The girl cat eats exactly the same food -- though possibly more of it -- and her poos do not smell like a fresh landfill covered with rotting zombie corposes.

2) A toast! When I've been in town this year, I've been taking reining lessons more seriously than I have in the past. After almost every lesson, we sit chatting in outdoor furniture beside the stalls where the horses are eating their supper and pooing -- they also do not smell as nasty as the boy-kitty. All of us are in dirt-covered boots and possibly poo-stained jeans. Dirt is smeared on our faces, and there are large sweat stains under our armpits. The trainer's wife brings a bottle of cheap white wine out of the house along with some delicate stemware, We fill our glasses, toast one another with dirty fingers and proclaim this little bit of wisdom: Wine: It's how us classy people get shit-faced.

Therefore, my friends whom I haven't spoken to in months, I toast you all with wine. It's how us classy people get shit-faced.

20th August 2011

1:46am: DVD Review - The Loss of a Teardrop Diamond

Buoyed by my enjoyment of "Captain America," currently in theaters, I rented "The Loss of a Teardrop Diamond," a "new" screenplay by Tennessee Williams that stars Bryce Dallas Howard and Chris Evans, aka "the Cap'n" of the aforementioned action movie.


I anticipated enjoyment. I did not anticipate swelling boredom.


Let's just say that the affection Tennessee Williams and director Jodie Markell have for the problems of selfish, self-centered, self-indulgent poor little rich girls far exceeds my own.






Wherein I pontificateCollapse )

"The Loss of a Teardrop Diamond" opened to six screens, IMDB tells me. It went to video thereafter. Rent at your own risk.


P.S. Sorry, guys. Can't figure out how to fix coding so this entry doesn't take up 552 lines.

18th August 2011

5:34am: Glee -- Lose the 3D
Tonight I went to see the Glee concert movie. And thoughts -- I haz them.


First, I'm no longer putting quotes around Glee, as is proper in AP style for album titles, TV show titles or Broadway productions. Glee is no longer a TV show or a music franchise or even a concert series. It's a theme park, and you don't put quotes around Disneyland.


Second, I completely enjoyed the movie for all the reasons I like the TV show -- the production numbers. It's all that pesky character business in between that I have problems with. And sure enough, the fledgling actors who are now household names aren't quite skilled enough to hold character for an entire concert. There were lots of character breaks.

Suppositions I am making from what I observed about people I don't know at all:Collapse )
The movie had no adults in it -- no Mr. Schue, no Coach Sylvester. But what I noticed was the show's appeal to adults. Sure, there were lots of screaming teens of both sexes in the crowd, but what sold me on the movie was when the camera panned across the crowd and stopped on a father, singing along with every word of "Don't Stop Believin'" as his daughter beside him did the same thing. It's the music that's the thing -- and the same song spoke to both of them.


One final thought: 3D added nothing to the show and in fact detracted from the overall experience. Wait to get this one on 2D DVD.


14th August 2011

3:28pm: Road Trip Musings
Between June 29 and today, I have been in my own bed nine nights.

9.

Nine.

But it's all worth it because I have tales to share. In the first of our tales, Our Intrepid Traveler goes to British Columbia, where a lovely hotel serves breakfast every morning. It's a nice buffet breakfast -- boiled eggs, cold cereal, oatmeal packets, fruit, etc. One area usually has hot food in chafing dishes. Usually some sort of omelet and sausage, etc.

One morning, there's a chafing dish labeled "hardwood smoked bacon." I don't keep bacon in my home, because a) only home for nine days in a month. It would spoil; and b) it wouldn't have time to spoil because I would eat it all within 24 hours. (I have a weakness for bacon). Bacon is better left as a treat for the road.

I enjoy the bacon very much, because it is DELICIOUS, and the next morning, the same chafing dish is labeled "bacon."

I lift the lid, eagerly anticipating the bacon -- and it's not bacon. It's big round discs of ham. Canadian bacon, as we call it in the States. It slowly dawns on me that -- ta da -- I'm in Canada! In Canada, Canadian bacon is called "bacon." That's why it's "Canadian" bacon.

So there you go. I have been culturally educated. Also, I'm rounder, because I ate a bunch of the "bacon" as well as the "hardwood smoked bacon." They were both delicious.

31st July 2011

3:27am: Rodeo Soap

My family had a reunion-type thing at Cheyenne Frontier Days. Sister Iris lives there, and it was a completely inconvenient time for me to leave work but I did it for family harmony and need many karma points for not killing them nice to be able to enjoy the experience with my family. Plus, I am given to understand that the local innkeepers mark up their prices ever-so-slightly during this tourist-driven attraction, so the free lodgings were a bonus.

 Frontier Days is a celebration of western culture, and the week includes festivities such as pancake breakfasts that feed thousands, parades, a carnival, concerts and many other related activities. Such as a vendor fair outside the rodeo arena. Where vendors sell western-themed items. Did I mention the vendors?

Soap Poll below the cutCollapse )

26th June 2011

1:17pm: The Weather
It's what we talk about down here, y'all!

Anyway, yesterday's high was a record 111. Today, we're expecting a cool front that will put us at 98. PLUS! PLUS! A 30 percent chance of thunderstorms.

Everyone is v.v. excited about the 70 percent chance of nothing.

OK, off for my morning shower. I get astonishingly stinky just laying in bed sweating.

25th June 2011

2:39am: The Weather and -- oh, yeah -- Some Fic
So we've been having a little spell of dry heat -- 104 degrees right now with no relief in sight. That means on Saturdays, I'd much rather be indoors rather than outdoors.

And in my free time, I've been watching my "Leverage" DVDs for Season 3. Repetitively. Some might say "obsessively," but I think that's harsh.

Anyway, as I'd rather write than clean house -- Fic! A tag to The Big Bang Job, inspired by Damien Moreau's comment, "The white hat doesn't really suit you but I like the hair."

Season 4 starts Sunday, so read it before it gets Jossed.

ETA: I just went out at 7:30 and did 30 minutes of yard work. I'm sweating like a stuck pig and probably smell just as awesome. It's still 102 degrees. You might get more fic tomorrow so I don't have to go outside then either.

19th June 2011

1:54pm: Like Poetry
"The Gingham Dog and the Calico Cat" is being enacted in my bedroom this morning. Except neither cat is made out of gingham or calico.

Evening Update: Both cats still alive. No fur scattered around the room. They're within a foot of each other, studiously looking elsewhere. *rolls eyes* I did not get you stupid cats to ADD drama to my life.

18th June 2011

6:04am: Small World
Today I was home, so I spent a couple of blessed hours in an estate sale haze (in 97 degree temperatures!) One of the houses where I went obviously had previously belonged to classical music enthusiasts. The couple had various NPR pledge-drive paraphernalia that the heirs did not appreciate; books scattered throughout the house on "eight essential operas of the 20th century and similar reference material; eight-track tapes and VHS tapes of "great performances" as well as -- TA DA -- a big bin of classical music CDs marked for 50 cents apiece.
What I FoundCollapse )


P.S. I also bought a set of wooden spoons. Much less fraught with emotional drama!

13th June 2011

4:07am: Marriage
I can't help but think that acquiring a second cat is akin to acquiring a second wife:

"Yes, Honey, I know he's cuter than you, younger than you, skinnier than you and sorta sexier than you, but really I love you both equally."

So far, my First Cat is not buying the Woo that I am Pitching.

10th June 2011

2:50am: Dancing Is Back!!!!! (Eleventy!)
Pasha returned to SYTYCD!!!

Really, there aren't enough exclamation points.

8th June 2011

5:19am: Musings About the Weather
1. It is warmish outside. I don't mean it was warmish about 3 p.m., when it hit 102 degrees and stayed there for a few hours. I mean right now, at 9:30 at night, it's warmish out. 96 degrees. I do not know why I went to the gym. I could have just sat in my house and sweated since I'm too cheap to turn on much AC.

2. We are now in the biggest drought since, like, 1920. Something like that. The city is only belatedly making noises about water conservation. I've been doing my part by not watering my lawn, but the city still felt obliged to send me a notice to mow my dry, dry weedy expanse of a back yard. I shall not mention the irony, except, oh, look, I already did.

3. I will continue not to water my lawn, but I draw the line at my giant tubs of tomatoes. I went to the farm and dug up two big tubs of "barn dirt," my mom's euphemism for what we pick up out of the horses' pens, put in big piles and allow to dry out in the sun. I then filled four big planter tubs halfway with "barn dirt," topped each one with potting soil, slipped in a few tomato plants and have been watering and fertilizing faithfully. I AM WILLING FOR ALL ELSE TO DIE BUT TOUCH MY TOMATOES AND IT IS AWWWWWNNNNN.

4. Speaking of mowing, as you will recall I did in No. 2, last year, I lovingly cherished and coddled six teeny weeny rose plants purchased for a bargain price. Each little plant grew from about 2'' high to about 8'' high under my kind benevolence, and I finally transplanted the little darlings to the great scary outdoors. And they lived! They lived! Right up until it was late in the summer and I hired a substitute to mow my lawn (so that I wouldn't get a notice from the city about my grass being too tall.) Unfortunately, I had let the grass get so tall that it was taller than my beloved teeny rose plants. Or something. Anyway, the lawn man KILLED MY DARLINGS with his evil mower. I wept true tears, because -- MAH BABEEEEES! This year, I did not plant baby roses. I couldn't take the pressure. Also, there was a good chance they would have died in the drought anyway.

5. This year, my neighbor's house is for sale, because she became ill and  moved to be with her daughter. A company is taking care of the place, it was kind enough to let me know in a doorknob hanger. She had been growing some lovely irises and day lilies, right on the dividing line between her front lawn and mine. Yesterday, the lawn-care company was parked out front of her house. Today, I noticed that the dividing line between her lawn and mine is flat. Yes, the evil lawn man strikes again! Irises and day lilies, all flattened.

6. In summary, lawn care companies=evil. But I have foiled them. If they can get their evil lawn mowers up on top of my tomato tubs -- well, I won't tempt them or anything, but it will be AAAAWWWWNNNNN.

26th May 2011

11:26pm: Cell Etty-Quette, Or How To Impress Your Boss
I do not care to post of work-related matters here, because a) these sorts of things have a way of winding back to the source and b) I'd rather post about other things anyway.

But today. Oh, today. How I have screwed you up.

About a month ago, I was issued a company iPhone in acknowledgment of the work I do so that the boss can reach me easier when he/she needs to.

I'm still getting used to it. My personal phone makes phone calls. Sorta. Sometimes. That's it's only trick. This new phone has lots of exciting features.

Such as...... RECEIVING PHONE CALLS!

Today, as I went into the women's bathroom at work, I had my iPhone in my purse, and I had my purse because there were certain supplies I needed access to. As I was seating myself, the phone rang.

I was at work! It's a work phone! I recognized the number as being a work-related call though I didn't know who would be on the other end. I answered it! Because we are Pavlov's dogs, trained to answer phones when they ring.

In this case, I was midstream, so to speak, and I started speaking with a certain head honcho, who will remain nameless but whom we can certainly refer to as "Mr. President."

He had not intended to call me. But my realization of my location, certain echolocution properties of a bathroom stall and the identity of the caller made me clench down.

Sorta. It sorta didn't work, biology being what it is and all, and the phone call was completely uncomfortable in more than one way.

But now we come to the moral of the story, Dear Friends, which is that phones do not have to be answered! Let them ring!



24th May 2011

2:21am: Of Grace, Not Mine

Greetings friends, neighbors, strangers-to-whom-I-haven’t-spoken in 562 years!

I’m sure you have forgotten me, so let me reintroduce myself. My name is Rose, and I’m a geek.

Lately, I’m a geek who travels for work, and I’m starting – today! – a blessed entire four weeks of no travel, thus I have time to update my journal. I have two stories. First, the story of the pump organ.

 

The Organ StoryCollapse )

 

 

And now the story of the cat, because apparently I’m unable to write about anything that doesn’t involve my cat lately.The Cat StoryCollapse )

31st January 2011

6:09pm: In Which I Have Become That Person Who Only Talks About Her Cat
A disaster befell me a year ago: I bought a house and decided to do most of the work on it myself. I did not take into consideration the knowledge that 1) I am lazy; 2) I work a lot; and 3) when I'm home from work I'd rather read than do housework of any variety, even the home remodeling type.

Nevertheless, painting has been called for the last two weeks, and I have dutifully pressed completely gorgeous Saturdays and Sundays into service despite their apparent usefulness as days upon which to sit on the back porch and read. But I digress into bitterness again.

In Which the Cat Helps Me RemodelCollapse )

In Which the Cat Aids My HygieneCollapse )

12th January 2011

7:24pm: All About My Cat
And your cat! And everybody's cat!

But wait, first I must 'splain why I have been incommunicado so long. It appears that a virus has infected and nearly destroyed my computer. I write to you now from a Kinko's because I have such exciting news.

During the holidays, I visited my friend Dawn in St. Louis. She's one of the guardians of a feral cat colony in the inner city. The cats have all been trapped, spayed and released to rejoin their natural feral group. Several neighbors have banded together to feed at specific times.

Because she has been watching the cats for so long, she's a real expert on cat behavior. As an example, she told me that my cat licking me constantly is a form of grooming, not a form of tenderizing the meat and testing it for juicy parts as I originally surmised.

I was so intrigued by the whole process that I insisted she start writing it all down. And SHE MINDED ME. You can follow the exploits of the St. Louis Feral Cat Colony at stlcatlady.livejournal.com or at thirteencats.blogspot.com.

If you're interested, follow along.

I apologize for the long absence. As soon as my computer tech allows the Dell to be safe for me to return to my home, I'll get caught up on everyone's lovely Chrismukkah fic.

28th November 2010

11:29am: Apparently, I make No. 2,000,001
This video has more than 2 million hits. Maybe some of you haven't seen it, either. It's a flash mob invading a food court with the Hallelujah chorus.

27th November 2010

7:53pm: Rosemary Sutcliff and Billy Elliot!
When I was a child, one of my favorite writers was Rosemary Sutcliff -- and thinking back I have no idea what a writer of such adult themes was doing in my junior high school library. Anyway, I was thrilled to learn that one of my favorite books from my still-favorite writer is being made into a movie.

Read more...Collapse )

22nd November 2010

7:47am: Day 20
While I was out of town for 19 days, the time changed. Guess who got up an hour early this morning, finally figured it out, went back to bed and is barely going to make it to work on time now?

21st November 2010

6:11pm: The Last 19 Days
For the last 19 days, I have been on a business trip.

Yes, that's N-I-N-E-T-E-E-N days. Of working. Out of town. Elsewhere. And not sleeping in my bed. And working. And I'm lazy.

That's 19 days of spending 18-20 hours per day with my co-workers. And not killing them. Which is its own sort of difficulty and stress, because some of them DARN WELL NEEDED KILLIN'.

Also, this happened:

Day FourCollapse )

Day FiveCollapse )

Day EightCollapse )

Day NineCollapse )

Day 10Collapse )
Day 11Collapse )
Days 12-18Collapse )

Day 19Collapse )

That's a problem that's going to have to wait for Day 20, because I'm heading off to bed now.




24th October 2010

2:30pm: It Gets Better
This piece really moved me today.

23rd October 2010

7:55am: RANGERS WIN
RANGERS WIN THE PENNANT! RANGERS WIN THE PENNANT! RANGERS WIN THE PENNANT!

21st October 2010

7:19am: A Bromance Comedy
I just got around to watching this week's episode of "Castle." Is it just me, or does everyone else think that somewhere in an AU, the TV show everyone is watching is called "The Amazing Adventures of Ryan and Esposito?"

Every week, in this universe, we get *hints* about all the wild and wacky antics that are going on in the bromance that is Ryan and Esposito. Someday, I'd like to watch that show, not just this one.

16th October 2010

9:38am: Home Again! With More Tales From the Road
It's hard to keep up with online activities when I'm traveling. What has been going on around here?

Here's one story from the road. I was in Columbus, Ohio, and stopped in at a Chinese restaurant that I know from previous visits to be both tasty and cheap. As I was dining on the kind of excellent, authentic moo shu pork that is unavailable in my hometown, the Ohio State football game was on in television in the bar part of the restaurant.

Tales From the RoadCollapse )
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